Do you look forward to bedtime?

Let me just preface this with the fact that I know I'm going against the grain a little on this one and that not everyone is going to agree with me on this and that's okay with me. I always try to be open and honest with you guys and am okay if not everyone agrees.

So with that being said....

Listen, I love my baby girl and I cherish every moment with her, every smile, laugh, kiss and hug. I am so thankful to get to be her mom, but man do I look forward to bedtime!!! Bedtime is when I know I get to have time for me. I get to SIT; I get to recharge. Without bedtime there is NO WAY I could be a good mom. I know, that may sound a little extreme, but I am convinced it's true.

Moms, we give and give and give and give and about 5 more gives.... ALL day! And if we have not even a minute to sit and recharge, how can we be all we can be? Yes, being a mom is all about sacrifice and yes you should put your kids needs before you own, but that does not mean that you ignore your own needs, and never give yourself anything you need, including time to yourself. One of the best things you can give your child is time to yourself and alone time with your spouse.

I talk to mom's ALL THE TIME that don't get this time because they spend that time putting their children to sleep, and OH MY GOSH they are super human!!! I honestly don't know how they function every day. And yes, I know there are seasons and times in life that you have to sacrifice for your children and it is definitely about your children's well being and what is best for them, but mom has to get some time to refocus and time to recharge.

Here's my opinion when it comes to bedtime and for that matter any decision you make for your children: YOU see the big picture and they do not, so you have to make decisions based on the big picture that you can see even if they can't understand that. You do it all the time with other things. For example, if your 2 year old wants to eat a hard candy that would make them choke, you would take it from them.... right??? Of course, because you see the big picture.... they would choke. So you take it from them even if they cry, or even if they nicely ask for it back, because you see the big picture and all they see is I want that candy.

Same goes for bedtime. You know that you need some alone time, and they need sleep, so you make the decision to leave their room after your bedtime routine. You let them fall asleep on their own without you laying down with them for.... "10 minutes.... I mean 30 minutes.... I mean it depends on the night.... an hour... I don't know I fall asleep with them most nights cause I'm so tired!" Oh my goodness who is in control here??? I'm just passionate about this because when mom's talk to me about getting their kids to sleep on their own, I hear this guilt in their voice, like they are being selfish or something.

But listen, giving you and your child the "gift of bedtime" should never be something you feel guilty about. They need it as much as you do! They need to be able to fall asleep quickly and with ease, so that their brains and bodies can develop and mature correctly. This is a lifelong skill that they will be thankful you taught them. Sometimes I hear the argument that they are only little for so long and my answer to that is: yes they are only little for so long, they will never get that sleep time back for their brains to develop and bodies to develop as they should. If they can't fall asleep quickly and with ease they are loosing precious hours of sleep that they need in order to do that.

If you need help getting their, I am more than willing to help. I've helped many parents get their kids that are 4 months-5 years old, to fall asleep on their own in a matter of days. So get in touch with me if you feel you need a little extra encouragement or answers to some questions you have about it. But the number one hurdle is to STOP FEELING GUILTY about it. They need it as much as you do!!!

I hope you all can hear my heart out there and know that I fully understand cherishing every moment, but we have to have balance Mama's of taking care of ourselves and still having a life outside of our kids. And knowing that we see the big picture that we have to base our decisions on and they do not.